PizzaBu
by RevisitedBlaze
Summary: Lu Bu starts his new job as a pizza boy, but will he be able to last long? PLEASE R/R, thank you.


Sun Quan grimaced and shoved more popcorn into his mouth.  
"I told you! They'll all die! All of 'em!"  
Liu Bei put his hands over his face.  
"Ah! Mindless death!"  
Cao Cao yawned.  
"I've never liked Godzila movies..."  
"Well... You have bad taste."  
Sun Quan laughed at his comment. Cao Cao bit his tongue, trying not to say anything. Liu Bei lifted his palms off his face and took a quick glance at the screen, then put his hands back over his face.  
"So much carnage!"  
"How can there be carnage! All you see is a huge rubber foot smoosh plastic busses and fry itself in electricity lines."  
Sun Quan looked paranoid and shoved all the popcorn in his mouth. Cao Cao raised a brow and continued watching the movie. Yuan Shao popped out of no where and jammed himself between Liu Bei and Sun Quan.  
"Sup?"  
Cao Cao looked surprised.  
"I thought you were killed by... umm... I thought you were dead!"  
Yuan Shao, wearing black baggy pants and an orange jacket with gold chains and a beaney crossed his arms and shook his head.  
"No way man, the Y dog never gets killed."  
"White dog?" Liu Bei said. "I thought this was a PG-13 movie... Sun Quan were you renting porn again????"  
"If I were renting porn it wouldn't have a guy in a lizard suit stepping on people!"  
Cao Cao still couldn't get over Yuan Shao's new look.  
"God damn it! I'm tired of wearing one thousand year old styles, I'm going to get my self a new look!"  
Cao stood and rushed out of the house. Liu Bei hid behind a vase as Godzilla was shot by a tank.  
"Ah you little winky! Come over here and watch the damn movie! I payed good money for this!"  
Sun Quan grabbed the Fritos and munched them down quickly. He saw Liu Bei slowly coming over.  
"While your up... Get me some damn chips!"  
Yuan Shou raised his middle finger to Gozilla.  
"That ^&*$%*$^# peice of &*(&... Destroying public transportation?!??? What kind of &&%(*% is that?"  
Sun Quan had never heard such words, he didn't know what to do, he was so scared and confused, he felt alone in a frigid ice box, he screamed and jumped off the back of the couch and rolled off of a coffee table, then hitting the ground, clearly knocked out.  
The door bell rang.  
"Pizza...."  
Yuan Shou looked around, shrugged and opened the door. There he saw some one... Some one he never did like... Lu Bu!  
"Give Lu Bu tit."  
Yuan Shou looked around.  
"Um... How about you just give me the pizza."  
"No! Give Lu Bu tit!"  
Yuan Shou pulled at the pizza box, but Lu Bu was much to strong and he was unable to get it.  
"DAMN CAN ANY ONE UNDERSTAND LU BU????? GIVE ME TIT!!!!!!!!!!"  
Yuan Shou unsheathed his sword, that was hanging loose from some chains and he swung it at Lu Bu.  
"You little &^^*)&^er, I should of killed you all those ^*&(%^*@ing days ago!"  
Lu Bu, looking puzzeled, grabbed the man's sword and threw it out into the street, he picked up Yuan Shao and threw him too into the street aswell.  
Lu Bu picked up a garden gnome, made sure it had a pointy hat and raised it over his head, ready to stab Yuan Shao.  
"NOW! GIVE LU BU TIT!"  
Yuan Shao screamed and pulled up his shirt. Lu Bu looked away and was ready to bash the gnome into his enemy, just as there was a little ding-ding and an Ice cream truck drove by, the side window opened and Zhuge Liang stuck his head out.  
"Oh... No young adults around, I seem to be unable to offer my product."  
He shrugged and slowly nibbled on a drumstick, then he turned and looked to Yuan Shao as he was thrown into the ice cream truck.  
"GIVE LU BU TIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
Zhuge Liang sighed and threw away his drum stick.  
"I do believe he means..."  
"LU BU TIRED OF MR. SWART!"  
"Do you mean sma.."  
Zhuge Liang was picked up and thrown on top of a passing volkswagen beatle.  
"Oh... Zhuge Liang this does not look good.." He rolled off the side and hit the street, he was crushed by numerous automobiles, but after all of it, he managed to stand and stumble over to a pay phone, just as he was about to dial 9-11, a tow truck slid out on the road and crushed the phone booth. Zhuge Liang, amazingly crawled out of the wreckage and stood. Then, a kamikaze pelican smacked directly into Zhuge Liang's forehead, he fell back, and laid there, he was just about to stand as a pack of rabid golfers rushed over his face. He looked to be dead, his skin was plane, bruised in every location, but he stood once again and picked up a spare tire, he lifted it over his head and threw it at Lu Bu.  
"I DO BELIEVE YOU MEAN TIP!!!!!!!!!!"  
The tire bashed againts the back of Lu Bu's skull and he fell flat on his face, landing on the cheese pizza. Zhuge Liang brushed himself off.  
"Why am I always subjected to such horror in Micah's fan fictions? Why can't any one else allow me to have some fun? Put me in some of those adult hentai fictions... As for Yaun Shou? It's sad really, he remains an old, crazy home dawg. 


End file.
